This morning I found another caterpillar on my tomatoes. A HUGE HONKIN CATERPILLAR. Totally 2 inches long. Totally chomping away at my tomatoes (seriously, you could see the chomp marks on a half eaten tomato). Poor green tomatoes šŸ˜¦

Here’s how the discovery went down: So I’m walking to the garden, dragging the hose (kinked so the sprinkler won’t spray me in the face) with C on my hip in the baby carrier. Ps- Dear Ergo baby carrier, I love you. You save my sanity in this clingy phase! C is immensely enjoying all this outdoor time btw. The heat and chiggers have pretty much driven us indoors the last 2 weeks. C misses eating green grass, leaves, twigs, and bark!

Before I position the sprinkler and let ‘er rip, I give the plants thier morning checking. LO AND BEHOLD: BIG POOP. Really big poop. As in big for insects on tomato leaves. Sigh, another green pest I assume. So I study the suffering tomatoes harder. And AHHH!! GIANT CATERPILLAR!! HUGE HUGE HUGE! That was all said and acted out in caps this morning too! šŸ™‚ C was heartily entertained.Ā 

I pinched off the tomato stem and stood there. How does one kill a two inch long (okay, so 2 inches isn’t really very long I guess) chubby caterpillar? By smooshing? That’s all I could think of. That and taking a picture but remember I’ve still got Bebe attached to me and the sprinkler ready to explode. That and I’m too lazy to walk to the house to get my camera (“cah-mar-ah” said like Jenna Marony pronounces it).

So I walk around looking for a stone/rock with which to smoosh the pretty but AWFUL caterpillar. All the time I’m kinda creeped out by this thing on a stem in my hand. But it’s slow and certainly can’t kill me before I notice it moving. Yes, I repeat that to myself. Then Ah-ha! I find a rock! A big one! I set that bugger on the driveway, and smoosh it with the rock.

AND I GET GUTS SQUIRTED ON MY FOOT.

GUTS.

Exploding. On my foot.

Gross. Perfect final revenge. Poor caterpillar.

Guts.

Anyway it’s dead. My foot is cleaned. And two morals: I need to be more like my farmer friend Summer who probably kills insects effortlessly. Also, I need to be less sqeamish seeing as how I am SURROUNDED BY NATURE. Last, probably dropping it in a pail of soapy water would have been the way to go.

PS- Caterpillars? Please eat ONE tomato instead of taking a single bite from five tomatoes. That and DIE.

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